I guess it wasn't so far off your normal way of expressing yourself that any of us thought it was weird. ;)However, random strangers reading your blog are probably in therapy now, if it makes you feel better.
Would it make you feel better to know that we had a BBQ before having family pictures taken recently, during which I dropped a piece of watermelon on my breast and literally looked like a lactating alien for our pictures? (Or maybe just a regular old lactating human . . . no matter what species, it was a lactating one.) Either way, lactating alien is definitely a phrase to hang on to.
Lol. (Okay so it was more of a chuckle and a wide grin.)